Breaking Up Is Hard To Do....

Dear John (Player),

I'm not really sorry to tell you this but our 14 year relationship is over. You make me feel like shit, I'm tired all the time and starting to get short of breath doing simple things. You cause the shortness of breath but not in a good way.

True, you have been there for me at some pretty rough times, but at what cost? It's almost like bribery with you, "I'm there for you but it will cost you financially and health wise". I'm smarter than that you asshole.

So yes, you life sucking scumbag, we are over.

Regards, Me
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Can you read me?

Just switched blog templates.... thoughts?

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Stuff.... For Sale

I am putting my remaining carriers on sale! The Organic Bobas are 100.00 each and the Wraps 30.00. I am in North Battleford, buyer pays shipping. The colours I have left are (Boba) Aspen (dark brown/off white) and Willow (light brown/green)

Wrap colours are, Dark Green (kind of an army green), Purple, Orange, Light blue (baby blue)

Both of these carriers are awesome! I used the wrap with my daughter and though at first 8 feet of fabric seemed daunting I was easily able to use the wrap and tie it. My daughter loved hers.

I have used the Boba with both kids (my son at 50+ lbs was still doable) and my daughter loves loves loves her boba. Again, one handed easy to use.



http://www.sleepywrap.com and http://www.bobababycarrier.com

Blackberry Pearl, red, sasktel network. Wall charger, USB cable, 2 batteries, and holster included. Make an offer, less than a year old.





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Mediation is done...

After nearly 5 months of stress over this whole thing it is finally over. Although the owner never admitted any fault (he claimed he never answered me when I asked if he would have hired me had of he known about my arm when in fact his answer was "no" and when I went back to inquire about the schedule he claimed he said "we like to try other people" and/or (it changed several times) "try harder" as opposed to "we decided to try other people because of your arm". Apparently telling someone they are hired, training them one day, and then trying out others who were also told they were hired is standard practice, an audition of sorts. I call bullshit but whatever.

Anyways, as it was obvious we were not going to agree on what took place we deadlocked and moved to separate rooms. The mediator basically then asked what terms I wanted out of this whole thing.

In order of importance,

• An apology, published in the newspaper. If he felt he could humiliate me in public, I felt he could apologize in public.
• For him to develop a clear policy on discrimination
• Added during the session, a clear policy on hiring and training procedures (including the apparent audition process
• And finally monetary compensation for lost wages, the delay to my EI claim, and injury to feelings.

I'm getting the apology written but not published (thats ok, I have a blog! The mediator says apologies are actually pretty rare)

He will be working with the Human Rights Commission to develop his discrimination policy.

He will be working with his lawyer to develop the hiring/training plan.

Financial compensation = $1000.00, not as much as I had hoped but this was never entirely about the money.

I could have said no and let it go to court etc but that is time consuming and kind of a difficult process with no guarantees in the end. Financial compensation through the courts might not have not have been much better considering they take into account length of employment etc. I suspect it would have been just as he said/she said because during our talks to day it was said that he girl who was supposed to train me told him she couldn't because I only had one arm. This is not the same server who took my side so although I had a witness he very well may have had someone backing up his (bullshit *cough*) version of events.

Part of the agreement of course has a clause stating that the settlement in no way implies he is guilty or that he admits to anything, nor does it mean I pulled my complaint. Just that we agree to disagree on the events that took place.

In the end, I do feel like I "won" because now he is forced to rethink how he does things, says things, and treats future applicants.


I would like to thank you all who had my back during this time... I love you all!



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Mediation....

Mediation will occur within the next two weeks. I'm just waiting for the mediator to get back to me on a date. To be honest I'm surprised they went for early resolution, likely their lawyer advised it.

So now I wonder what would be fair for me to propose as a settlement, I know I want a massive apology but yes I am seeking financial compensation. The whole fiasco further complicated my claim for EI after Movie Gallery closed... I lost out on a full-time salary and tips. Tips that I suspect would have been pretty darn good considering what I made only serving 4-5 customers that one shift.

Also, compensation on the emotional front. I used to think that was a stupid excuse to get money until I was grossly humiliated in front of a restaurant full of people and then again to my face with what was said. The feelings I felt that night were indescribable. I was excited for the new job, happy that I had proved myself, and then..... "we decided to try other people because of your arm" . That was the verbal equivalent of a sucker punch to the face. I have pretty solid self esteem considering the verbal bitchslaps I have taken through the years in regards to my arm, but a comment like that after proving I was *ahem* awesome and capable? Bitchslap 1, self esteem 0.

So, hopefully I can find a lawyer to simply offer some advice to me prior to mediation... Harder than it sounds though, either they do not deal with this sort of thing or nobody is in the office *sigh*

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The results of "ignoring" my kids...

FYI those are safety scissors ;)






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I sometimes ignore my kids, and it's ok

Yes, you read that right. I'm an AP mommy who also (sometimes) ignores her kids and just lets them play. Scary Mommy posted about this very thing today and after reading it I felt o.k. I felt better than o.k in fact. (See her post here) I felt like I do not have to hide the fact that I do not helicopter over my kids every second of the day. I let them be and they are fine.

When I say ignoring I do not mean I have no idea what they are up to, I always know. When they need me I am still there. They know this therefore they are secure and able to occupy themselves while I do something else.

I tried being the helicopter parent who schedules every damn second of my kids days. It sucked! When my daughter was a newborn I would bundle my kids up and walk 3 blocks to the library once a week for toddler story time. Winter session. -30. I. Despised. It. I did it to appease my mother-in-law who is convinced that I do not do anything worthwhile with my kids. The only person who enjoyed the weekly trek was my baby girl, she was all wrapped up in a Sleepy Wrap under my over-sized winter coat and usually sleeping. My son? Well, I do not think he much cared for it, every week I was chasing my then 2 year old around a tiny room in the library trying to get him to just sit and listen to the story. Sounds like fun eh? I think he (and I) would have preferred our normal story time. It involves him grabbing a book, asking me to read it to him (several times) until he is bored and interested in something else.

My kids have an abundance of art supplies available at all times, they have lego, and cars, and barbies, and most importantly THEY HAVE IMAGINATIONS and freedom, they know they can get paint on the floor or all over themselves and nobody will get mad. I have some me time, I have the ability to clean the kitchen mess I did not make without interruption. I have happy, secure children who can play, really play and still know mommy is there. My kids have learned appropriate social skills such as sharing, and co-operation by simply playing together without interference or a grown up hovering, planning, or dragging them around every waking minute.

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